I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Can you repeat that, but with context?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
