I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
