Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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