i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
