i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
