I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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