Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
