Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
