If i come over, it means nothing
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
