Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
ugly people sure do ruin things
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
