Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
