I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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