There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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