i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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