He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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