New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
should my penis look like a turkey
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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