He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
