lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I am naked and annoyed.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
