508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
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