All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Randomize
