There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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