I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
