There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
