i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
