"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
