I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
