My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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