found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
