My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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