I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
