nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
