Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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