So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
