it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
