community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
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