Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize
