they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
