I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
