That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
