bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
