thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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