hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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