I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
no you cant smoke seaweed
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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