if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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