Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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