I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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