If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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