He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
