We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
