Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Your penis caused this!
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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